Getting out there

I spoke to a dear friend earlier and as usual i start rambling on about all my insecurities and happenings and after i said something i came to the realization that i like being me. i like being myself instead of trying to be something that i'm not or rather what i want to become. as headmaster says.... just be. and i guess that's what i'm constantly struggling with. Thank you, Lyn!

on tuesday i did something new. i signed up to sing some filipino christmas carols for the parol stroll on dec 9 at yerba buena. i'm so excited to see parols. anyways, my first rehearsal was on tuesday. there wasn't many people there, but i was excited nonetheless. i needed this shakeup, if you will. i needed to meet new people. it felt like being a freshman in high school again... or better yet, like my first year at sac state, when i didn't know anyone and not sure how to meet new people. nervous. i kept thinking to myself, is this how some of our new cast members feel when they first join sinag-tala? and i kept hoping that these people would accept me in their group, just how i want to make new cast members feel like by accepting them into our awesome family. to a certain extent, i feel that i was at this rehearsal.

first, we did a couple of stretching excercises and then some vocal warmups. then we jumped in to a couple of songs. off the top of my head, i can't recall the names of them. one of them was for sure Kasadya... but in tagalog. :) i kept thinking in my head that i wouldn't know how to pronounce any of these words had it not been to my Sinag-tala training. i've been doing ST for so long that it was kinda hard to keep my excitement/voice down. i didn't want to make it sound like i was being yabang. but i was thinking that more than being/sounding mayabang, i was being proud. proud of the fact that i can do this because of ST and all the amazing artists connected with it. =p

all-in-all i was just proud of myself for getting out there again. taking a step and a chance. i still have to work on being quiet, especially since i don't really know these people. we'll see how everything goes.