A Realization

Never say never. i've lived long enough to know this rule almost sticks to all situations. i've just come to the realization that this is most likely to be the last time i'm on stage with my sinag-tala family. i'd be with them right now had it not been for the guilt laid upon me to the tune of, "i barely see you and you're going again. you were there last night. THEY MEAN MORE TO YOU THAN ME?" egads. however, after i got the green light to go, i'm just not physically able to. i just got so tired all of a sudden. i didn't help that i got home late last night.

swerved a couple of times last night. honestly, i don't even remember how i got home the last couple of miles. it was just like a dream. unfortnately, this wasn't the first time that this happened. i must be getting older. well, couple that with the driving being so damn lonely. sorry to sound kawawa, but just need to vent. and it's a lot easier to be kawawa to a blog than to actually tell someone about this.

fortunately, i'm only in two numbers. still, i feel so bad about not being there. crap, i wish i could have the power of teleportation like hiro from heroes so i wouldn't have to drive. i'm really proud of everyone in the show cuz it looks like that everything is starting to come together. that's another reason why i feel bad about not being there. i want to share their experience. but if i really wanted to do that, i would have signed up to be in more of the show.

on a side note, i'm annoyed about something that happened, or more literally, not happening in the show. really annoyed. i know that this person doesn't want to talk about it, but she DESERVES so much more! i'll leave it at that. grrr. kakainis ko.

but i digress. still annoyed.

i wish i was there. i wish i could get up there. kawawa na man. sobra. better stop. i'll write more later.