Break me...

i'm watchin pda 2 they're doing this exercise in dance class where i guess this weeks lesson is centered around sensuality with their songs and attitude. i'm like... uh. okay. i guess it's part of their overall lessons of being a performer. i guess what i'm taking from it is the separation, er rather, the correlation between being sexy and "being" sexy as in terms of attitude.

ok, this train of thought has totally derailed. anyways, today i was up in sac for the funeral of the funky bass player's wife. hecka sad. funerals suck because well... they just do. sometimes you kinda think that after you've been to enough of them that you can get used to them. but no. no matter how long ago the last funeral you were at, you're transported to that point in time when all the tears, sniffling, come flooding back. sometimes you think that, or maybe you force yourself to think that these times are not supposed to be about wallowing in the saddness of death, but rather to revel in the life that person leaves... but no matter how much you try to think that way... nope. we're only human after all. but it's also at these times when i think about gary's song, break me. to me, it is about the acceptance that not everything is "okay" and this is my time to not only mourn, but to totally break down... but knowing and having the trust that Jesus, or place your higher power here, is and will always be there to build you back up with the utmost love and care. He is the only one who can do that. It's just being able to believe and trust that He will. i respect other people's belief's and i hope that they can respect mine.

aside from the saddness of today, i liked sharing life with some of my closest friends. it's been a while, but i'm hoping to do more of it soon.... it's a good way to get away from real life.